171. What a demure, mindful, and brat summer
I was listening to Adrian Ma's take on the trends of the 2024 summer aesthetics, "Goodbye, brat summer" on All Things Considered today. As a young person in the digital era of trying times, I just have to weigh in as well- are we living in a time of contradictions? Am I, myself, a demure and mindful brat?
If you have spent even a little bit of time on social media this summer, you have probably seen that meme. You know, the slime green squares and people proudly calling themselves brats? - Adrian Ma
Source: A Rough Guide To: Brat Summer
On one side, we have “brat summer,” a season drenched in audacity, where cheeky attitudes and carefree days is in. In the beginning of June 2024, Charli XCX released an album that inspired a new generation of artists in the hyperpop genres as well as their young music consumers. It’s the summer of saying exactly what you mean, flaunting your independence, and letting the world know that you won’t be tamed. It’s a vibe, a mood, and for many, a reclaiming of the playful rebellion we left behind in the past.
But then - the pendulum swings to the other side, where, perhaps, the very anthithesis of "brat" takes its place. A microtrend on all the major social media outlets was born: demure (mindful, classy, cutesy). It’s about slowing down, choosing intention over impulse, and finding grace in the subtle, the understated. It’s not just about the clothes we wear, but the lives we lead. However, is it just "not brat?". This trend whispers where brat shouts, trading bold declarations for quiet reflection. Is demure in this late summer a chance for us to redeem our bratty mistakes?
On the same note of these trends, I'm feeling the two trends in full force. In the past year or so- I would often entertain my friends, especially misu, about my stories, usually about a new city I visited or a love interest, each one as unpredictable as the next. I haven't been updating much on the blog as much as I'd like, but they are very amusing tall tales of my love life that got many comments from the Bear Blog community before I refreshed my Guestbook section (big thanks to Meadow for the handy new tool). These almost-relationships, where you’re more than friends but less than lovers, are layovers of the heart - transitory, and yet somehow, significant.
While these situationships were thrilling in the moment, they were also tinged with the bittersweet awareness that they, like traveling, were not meant to last. Maybe that’s the allure of them - the freedom to be a little bratty, to flirt with the idea of something more, without the weight of commitment. Me, being kinda tongue-in-cheek at the moment, would label it as, "cosplaying intimacy." It’s the same freedom that travel offers: the ability to reinvent yourself, to try on new personas like you try on new outfits, knowing that you can leave them behind when you move on to the next destination.
There’s a demure side to this story too. I cannot speak for others, especially the people I got romantically entangled with, but for all the excitement and adventure, there’s also a quiet longing for something more substantial, something that lasts beyond the expiration date of a train ticket. It’s the same feeling you get when you return home after months on the road, craving the familiar, the stable, the real. I still got thinking to do and still organizing myself in the process. I'll probably dwell on this topic again.
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Even though they're both very opposite, I think they're kind of reacting to the same sort of feeling in the culture that people are experiencing this year. I think people in general are just feeling a lot of chaos. And what's interesting to me about brat and demure is that both of them are sort of different ways of coping or moving through chaos and uncertainty. Brat is embracing it fully, embracing the mess, embracing the wildness. And then demure, in a way, it's like a more calming way of moving through life. It's really sort of, I think, tuning out the big noise and just focusing on the small things. - Charles Trepany, "Goodbye, brat summer"
The juxtaposition of these trends isn’t a battle, but rather a dance. After all, isn’t that what we’re all doing? Balancing our inner brat with a mindful approach to the chaos of modern life? One moment we’re pounding vodka redbulls with backpackers at the Thailand beaches, and the next we’re meditating on the mat, seeking calm in the storm.
Maybe that’s the beauty of this moment. We don’t have to choose between the two. We can be demure and mindful in the morning, then let our inner brat run wild as the sun sets. In a world full of expectations, there’s power in embracing the contradictions within us. Because at the end of the day, whether we’re demure or a brat, we’re just trying to be ourselves.
~ being mindful in the chaos,
<3 K